Module
13

Communication Strategies: Repair and Termination

At the end of this module, I can:

• engage in a communication situation using acceptable, polite, and meaningful communication strategies, specifically, repair and termination; and
• explain through examples and simulations that a shift in speech context, speech style, speech act, and communication strategy affects the following: language form, duration and interaction, relationship to speaker, role and responsibilities of the speaker, message, and delivery.

Repair

“No offense, but …”

Have you said this line before to anyone? Or has someone said this to you? This utterance points to a communication strategy that prepares the listener for what he or she will hear and somehow lessens the negative impact of a message. Other phrases that people commonly use to lessen the negative impact of a particular message include “With all due respect …” and “Don’t get me wrong, but ….” But what if the message has been relayed already and you have offended the other party? How then will you repair the damage caused by the message?

Repair is the communication strategy for recouping lost rapport between or among communicators in a conversation. Saying “sorry” is the most common repair strategy. Taking back what one has said is another, so is restating one’s message. In such instances, the following phrases are commonly used:

• “That came out wrong … let me rephrase that …”
• “I’m sorry, I take that back …”
• “Let me clarify that …”

Repair is also done when a mistake is committed, such as mispronouncing a word or using the wrong term. In such instances, you will most likely try to correct yourself to avoid being misunderstood or laughed at. You might say, “Actually, it’s (correct term/pronunciation)” or “My bad, I meant to say (correct term/pronunciation).”

Big Idea

There are three steps involved in making an apology: (1) say sorry; (2) admit your mistake; and (3) do something to make it right. Be sure to do all these three when apologizing.

However, if you are not aware of making such a mistake, then the person you are speaking with might try to correct you. Such instances can sometimes be embarrassing, especially if the other person is not particularly close to you. Also, remember that you should not laugh at other people’s mistakes. Instead, find a respectful way to correct them.

Reflect Upon

In a heated argument, would you apologize to the other person even if you believe that you are right? Why or why not?

 

 

 

 

What Have I Learned So Far?

Box the statements that you can use to repair a communication situation that is about to break down.

I apologize for the mistake.

Shut up!

What do you want me to say?

Can we start over?

Are you serious?

Really?

Excuse me. Let me repeat that.

How about you?

Are you kidding me?

May I ask for another try at it?

You know what, let’s just stop.

Bye!

I’m sorry, I mean …

Thank you for understanding my shortcomings.

I do not like to talk to you.

What the hell!

Wait!

That is not funny.

Can you please repeat that?

Good morning to you, too.

Are you thirsty?

I might have offended you.

Let me make it up to you.

Let’s talk this over another time.

Are you for real?

Oh, sorry! Let me try again.
Big Idea

If necessary, you may end the communication situation at the moment, but do not end relationships and burn bridges.

Termination

As a communication strategy, terminating or ending an interaction is useful in avoiding conflicts or in diffusing arguments. However, it must be done as politely as possible. The following tips may prove useful in instances where you need to terminate a conversation.

1. Express your desire to end the conversation politely.
2. Apologize for having to cut the conversation.
3. You may use any of the following statements:
• “Never mind, it doesn’t matter. Let’s not talk about it anymore.”
• “I’m sorry, I’m not comfortable talking about this.”
• “I wish I could stay and talk more, but I have to go.”
• “It’s been great talking to you, but I’m afraid I have to go.”
• “Excuse me, but I really need to get going. Let’s talk again soon.”

You may still come up with other prompts or phrases that you can use in instances where you need to terminate a conversation.

Remember that termination is a good strategy only if all efforts to communicate effectively have been exhausted. Giving up easily, especially during intercultural exchanges, deprives the participants of valuable learning opportunities. Unfortunately, language barriers cause some people to terminate a conversation immediately instead of trying to figure out ways to facilitate effective communication. The result is that many things are left unsaid or unexplained. Discussions that could otherwise be fruitful do not occur. However, if a communication situation turns bad—when an argument is brewing, for instance—termination done politely is the best possible recourse.

Reflect Upon

What would you do if your friend still has a lot of exciting stories to share but you really have to leave?

 

 

 

 

What Have I Learned So Far?
1. Think of a situation where it would be better to terminate the communication process. How will you terminate the communication in this situation?

 

 

 

2. Think of a situation where it would be better to keep the communication process going. How will you prolong the communication in this situation?

 

 

 

Consider the following examples of communication situations where either repair or termination is used.

Situation 1:

image

Situation 2:

image

Situation 3:

image

Situation 4:

image

In situations 1 and 2, the communicators used repair in correcting oneself (situation 1) and in apologizing for not getting the listener’s name right (situation 2). In situations 3 and 4, termination is the strategy used to avoid arguing with somebody (situation 3) and in ending a heated phone conversation (situation 4).

Big Idea

While expressing emotion is part of communication, it is best to let anger subside before resuming the interaction to avoid hurting other people.

Reflect Upon

How do you think do repair and termination affect the effectiveness of the communication process?

 

 

 

 

Beyond Walls 13.1 Apply It in Real Life

Track: Arts and Design

You are part of a group of aspiring actors and actresses who will attend an acting workshop that a TV network sponsors. The workshop leader asked your group to choose and act out a scene from one of the TV network’s soap operas that shows a heated argument or intense confrontation between the characters of the show. You may look for the scene from a video sharing site online. You will assign roles to your group members, including a narrator who will explain what the scene is about and whether the scene shows repair or termination of the interaction. To convince your workshop leaders of your talent in acting, make sure to embody the roles that you will play and be mindful of how lines for repair and termination are delivered based on the character’s emotions and the goals of communication.

What Have I Learned So Far?

As a group of students perform the activity in Beyond Walls 13.1, identify the lines in the scene that show various communication strategies, such as nomination, restriction, turn-taking, topic control, topic shifting, repair, and termination. After identifying the lines, explain how the strategy is employed, considering language used, verbal and nonverbal cues, and the like.

1. Communication strategy:

 

Line(s) delivered:

 

 

Explanation:

 

 

2. Communication strategy:

 

Line(s) delivered:

 

 

Explanation:

 

 

3. Communication strategy:

 

Line(s) delivered:

 

 

Explanation:

 

 

Beyond Walls 13.2 Go Online

Are you able to control or manage your anger? Take an anger management test at http://gracepointwellness.org/116-anger-management/article/3396-anger-quiz. How did you feel about taking the test? How does anger management affect communication and interaction?

Extend Your Knowledge

Visit the following websites to know some tips on handling various communication situations.

• http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/sticky_situations_and_nonverbal_cues.html
• http://careerplanning.about.com/od/workplacesurvival/tp/work_talk.htm
Essential Learning

Communication strategies are usually learned through experience, such as when you discover that a mere word can either hurt or uplift another person. Through experience, you learn the topics that people do not want to talk about. Moreover, experience teaches you how to properly and politely repair or terminate communication situations.